Hello, my name is Paige Baxter. I’ve recently gone through a life-changing, personal healing journey. During that journey, my mindset, thinking, how I act, and even the things that I post on social media have changed. I was asked by my cousin to share my views with you all, not only on my journey, but on the power of forgiveness. First things first, though. I think it is important for you to know a little bit about my journey and how I got here……….
I’ve put tons of energy into myself in 2019. I’ve purposely invested time in myself in order to truly heal…heal my soul and my heart. Through my healing journey, I was blessed enough to find God again, and at a time in my life when I needed him the most. You see, I was at a place in my life where I needed to re-find my glory, remember whose child I was, and rediscover my true life’s calling. Finding God this time around was different than when I found him during my years in the church. Being able to reconnect with him on a spiritual level has given me the ability to not only understand certain things in the Bible, but to have a better understanding of how the universe, karma, vibrations, thoughts, and energy all work and flow together to create our reality. My faith and belief in God are stronger than ever before and it’s now a bond and a unique understanding that can never be broken. No, I’m not Christian, and I do not practice religion. I believe in spirituality, meditating, smudging, crystals, chakras, sage, and energy. I believe in the power of the SOUL and its ability to connect with God on a spiritual level.
As I poured energy into myself and God, beautiful things began to take place in my life. Once strained relationships began to heal all on their own, my spirit became lighter, my light began to shine brighter, my heart became happier, and my smile became infectious. I realized that in doing this I had begun to heal myself from the inside, which in turn manifested into my reality on the outside.
One day, I sat back and took the time to realize how healing my soul also allowed me to forgive, major key! We will all face hurt, pain, and trauma in our lives. It’s similar to death in that it’s inevitable. I realized that before I took the time and effort to heal myself, I had never been able to forgive the people who had hurt me throughout the years; the people that betrayed me, played me, abandoned me, tried to break me, and legit prayed for my downfall. I carried that pain with me every day and I took it everywhere I went. It became the unseen baggage in my life. It created an internal weight on me, causing me to become emotional every time I spoke about it. It made my soul heavy.
It’s funny to me now because I used to preach forgiveness to my friends and family, but I didn’t even know what it was or what it even really felt like. Through healing and through God, first and foremost, I was able to be made whole again, and in that, I was able to forgive all of those that spoke against or trespassed against me. Through loving God and myself, I was able to let go of the pain and the baggage, truly letting the past stay in the past; it was at that point that I realized that I was able to forgive EVERYONE! I did not carry them with me everywhere, and I no longer took that pain and anguish with me either. My soul became lighter and started to shine brighter and brighter.
What are the lessons about forgiveness that I have learned throughout my healing journey, you ask?
Recently, I was on social media and I ran across a post from one of the many people who have trespassed in my life. I immediately began typing, preparing to point out their hypocrisy and decided to speak my “truth” and “expose” them. As I laid there trying to come with what I was going to say, how I was going to say it, and if it would be too many characters to fit in the comment box….something happened. A voice (God) came over me, and I felt a sense of calmness, and “exposing” that person was no longer on my spirit. Through forgiving them and a strong relationship with God, I realized that having the last word is not always needed. I know what happened, they know what they did, and no matter how it’s masked, in reality, there is also another person that knows, too: my mighty and faithful God.
At the end of the day, we all have to answer for our sins, mistakes, shortcomings and wrongdoings. I won’t have to answer for what they did, but I will have to answer for what I did with my time on this planet. When I thought about my answer to “exposing” said person, I realized I couldn’t even use the “I didn’t know better at the time” excuse; I did know better, so I listened to God and decided against it.
Growth for me was walking away from an opportunity like that and keeping it between God and I. When I sat down and thought about it, I was able to do that through the power of forgiveness. When I realized the power that forgiveness created in my life, I realized the pain, hurt and the people that did those things no longer had power over me. For years, I’ve heard people say “you forgive people for yourself, not for them” and never got it…until I was today years old. Through the power of forgiving, I was able to release my traumatic baggage by relinquishing their power/hold over my life.
All in all, my good people, don’t let the trespassers against you win. Believe in God, believe in yourself, in your light, and in love. If you don’t take away anything else from me and my journey, just remember, they failed because God WON! Peace, Prosperity, Positivity, Aśe! – Paigey B.
State University. Her love and passion for mental health and for working with children placed a calling on her life to be a social worker, a field she’s worked in for the last 3 years. She seeks to impact the world through her testimony, her ability to uplift, encourage, and inspire others to believe in themselves. She wants people to see the beauty within themselves and recognize their own worth and just how amazing and magical they can be. She takes pride in being blessed so that she may be a blessing to others. She believes that is the true meaning of being human and being a child of God.