Christianity and Sexual Maturity

By Daniel Holder

Is Theology an Excuse to not Reach Sexual Maturity?

These pastoral sex scandals, either with men, women, or children, indicate to me that maybe theology does not encourage sexual development.  There is a blessing in the “hoe phase” (at least, that’s what I hear) because at least then you know yourself.  You learn your likes and dislikes, your vulnerabilities, and your pain points.  

In Christianity we are taught to deny ourselves and follow what we are told the Bible says, but can we deny ourselves?  Or do we just postpone our desires and wait for their surprise resurfacing when we have families and communities that depend on us?

If you preach well, it’s okay if you lie to yourself, and we’ll ignore the skeletons in your closet.  Maybe the pedestals that we place people on do not seat them out of reach of temptation.  Maybe we should encourage getting to know ourselves?

If God Made Man….

I read somewhere that in the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. Maybe you’re familiar with the text.  God proposed that humanity be made in the divine image and the human form was molded by divine hands and animated with divine breath.  

If men and women were created in God’s image, God breathed into us personally.  The task was not delegated to angels.  How then do we arrive at an understanding that we are inherently wicked?  Wouldn’t that mean that God is inherently wicked?  I would like to entertain the notion that inside us we have the potential for both good and evil.  We can be evil when we choose evil, but inside us is also the potential for good, beauty, and life.  

And Man Made the Bible

But the Bible says…, yes, the Bible does say that we are wicked on the inside, but that leads to my next question.  Many believe in the Bible’s inerrancy.  I do not prescribe to that belief and here is why.  The Bible says it was written by the hands of men who were inspired by the Spirit, but they were still men. 

Men and Women have the potential–whether intentional or not–for error, to insert bias, or to be influenced by the situations around us.  Can we believe the Bible is inerrant while believing it was written in the hand of “inherently evil” men?

I am not at all discounting the Bible. I just sometimes think that we use it incorrectly.  The Bible speaks differently to different groups and communities, but with our current theology, we believe that there is only one way.  If you want to go to heaven, then you must believe this.  Nobody that has ever penned a word of theology controls any celestial guest lists.  

Then we have a Journal or Human Experience throughout time.

Our Theology has developed into a system that teaches young men and women how to behave. Psalm 119:9 says “how can a young man keep his way pure?  By guarding it according to your word.” Those words were penned by a rapist and a murderer, is this who you want guiding your children?  

I am not perfect, and I don’t know many people who are, but I believe that it is through mistakes and indiscretions that we learn about ourselves and the world around us.  Maybe we should allow young people to explore and make small mistakes in their youth to prevent Bathsheba-sized mistakes in their adulthood.  

At this point, you are pointing out my double standard with David, and I guess the answer is yes.  I think our children are much safer being guided by someone who’s made mistakes, they know their vulnerabilities and they are willing to safeguard themselves among a community.  

How Can Faith Move you?

Spirituality is a revolution.  It is not safe inside an organization neatly wrapped inside religion, let’s move fast and break things.  If God created man in the divine image, then how could he or she be inherently evil.  It is absolutely easier to do evil things than good, but we reach the apex of our potential when we do good.  

But in order for us to do good, we need to understand the bad, and what the path for getting there looks like.  That is what we can begin to use the Bible for.  1 Corinthians 10:11 tells us that the Bible is to be used as an example so that we don’t have to make every mistake, but we need to read it right, see the mistakes and acknowledge how the Bible interacts with our experience  

So how do we create that community?  Let’s talk about it.  But will there be food?